


The Love Song

by nxriamartin (NMartin)



Category: Mamma Mia! (Movies)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-06
Updated: 2018-10-11
Packaged: 2019-07-07 16:44:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15912231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NMartin/pseuds/nxriamartin
Summary: Tanya visits Donna at Kalokairi a few years after Sophie is born. One night at the taverna, the two sing the love song Tanya composed in collegge.





	1. I've been waiting for you

Donna smiled, sitting on top of the hood of the Land Rover as she watched the ferry approach. She couldn’t wait for Tanya and Rosie to get off the ferry. It had been two years since she had last seen them, and a few weeks since she had received the brunette’s last letter. Donna loved being isolated in Kalokairi with her little Sophie. It was a dream she did not want to wake up from.

From what Tanya had written, Rosie had started to study in culinary school and had met a young chef which she had fallen for. Then, he had fallen in love with a blonde, green eyed waitress from the restaurant he worked in— making Rosie’s world fall apart. Tanya had then invited her to spend her holidays in her parents’ mansion in Buckinghamshire, but of course the petite girl had fallen for the stable boy.

_ <<She is a nightmare, Donna. It’s so easy, Donna, to not to worry about money. Just find a wealthy man, marry him, fool around and have a ball. She could be happily married now, you know? Charles has this friend, he owns a mansion a few miles away from my parents house. He actually offered to pay for her classes! But no, she has to fall in love with Daniel. You know who that is? The boy that lives in pops’ house and takes care of the horses. He has nothing to offer, and for once I don’t mean just economically. He is an asshole, Donna. She deserves better. And then three days later, her heart breaks. She doesn’t drown her sorrows anymore. She suffocates them with cake.>> _

Tanya loved to complain about Rosie’s heartbreaks. It was as if, once the passion of her own relationships disappeared, the brunette started to focus on her best friend’s romantic life. Donna couldn’t say she approved Tanya’s way of life. But after all, who was she to judge? Her best friend had told them a thousand times that she did not fall in love. Tanya said she had married her husband because that was what she was supposed to do, as the heiress of the Chesham-Leigh fortune. She claimed that something was always off with the men she dated. The only people Tanya loved were her parents, her friends, and now little Sophie too. Sophie was the apple of her eye. Tanya had come visit them many times since the little girl was born, sometimes with her husband and sometimes alone. Rosie also visited them, but only during the holidays— she had had almost no free time these past years.

And so, years had passed, and almost nothing changed for Donna.

Tanya got off the boat, and the blonde realized— she hadn’t changed either. The slender, long legged young woman walked out of the ferry, wearing a picture hat and a purple dress. At almost twenty six years old, Tanya Chesham-Leigh looked radiant. Her smirk turned into a grin as she spotted Donna on the other side of the dock. “Donna Sheridan, you shady lady. Have not changed a bit since I left.” she muttered to herself, opening her arms as the blonde ran to her.

“Tanya!” Donna laughed, almost tackling her. They stumbled back as they giggled, hugging each other tight. Tanya pressed her face against the other’s curls, smelling the faint citric scent that came from it. “I’ve missed you so much.”

“Aw, me too, Donna.”

“Where’s Rosie?”

“Studying. Apparently there are a hundred ways to cook a chicken, and she needs to master them all for her test next week.”

“Oh.” Donna sighed. “I thought it was gonna be the three of us this time.”

“Hey,” she looked down at the other, taking her face in her hands and caressing her cheek with her thumb. “She misses you so much, every single day. You have read her letters. The Dynamos are not the same without our lead singer. I promise she will come back next time.”

“I know, but… I really thought this time she would 

“Now, I want to see my favourite girl in the whole world. Where is Sophie?”

“Sofia is taking care of her at the tavern. Let’s go.”

* * *

 

“I swear to god, this woman is a blessing.” the blonde sighed as she saw the old lady take Sophie in her arms. The little girl had fallen asleep in the old couch of the taverna, exhausted after playing all day with her aunt. In the end, Sofia had offered to take care of the girl, as long as the two women closed the taverna that night. Only a few patrons were left in the old building, sipping from their glasses as they played cards.

“No, Donna. This wine is a blessing.” Tanya laughed, finishing her third glass of wine as Donna cleaned the counter. Her high heels off, she rested her feet on a chair, sipping from the dark red liquor as she hummed a tune.

“You’re an alcoholic, Tanya.”

“No, I’m a wine enthusiast.”

“Oh, shut up.” the blonde sighed. “Okay guys, time to go home.  _ Χρόνος να πάει στο σπίτι,  _ or whatever you guys say.”

“You finally learned greek?”

“I’m trying. Sophie speaks it better than me, she goes to class in the peninsula. Sofia and Lazaros help me whenever I can’t take her or pick her up, which is often because the hotel is still a ruin and I’ve only been able to fix two or three bedrooms. When Sophie comes back I make dinner and bring her here, until she falls asleep. I don’t think she has ever listened to  _ My Love, My Life  _ completely…”

“If you sang  _ My Love, My Life  _ to me I would fall asleep too.”

“Hey, it’s one of our best songs, I don’t know why do you hate it so much.”

“It’s just such a sad song, Donna.”

“ _ I’ve been waiting for you  _ is also a sad song, and you love it.”

“I love it because I composed it, Donna.” the brunette said, looking away and standing up. Barefoot, she waved at the men who were walking out of the door and started cleaning the tables. “And it is not a sad song, it’s a song about finding love again when you think it won’t happen again.”

“I think this is the first time I see you clean something.” Donna was in a state of shock, watching the other clean intently as she put the chairs on top of the tables. “You never told us who the song is for.”

“No one.”

“Yeah, right. The same way my mother has a song called  _ Fernando  _ and she says it is not about my father.”

Tanya rolled her eyes. Walking to the stage, she took Donna’s dusty guitar and took a seat on the edge, positioning herself. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, letting herself turn again into the cheerful teenager that spent her nights playing and composing. “ _ Can you hear the drums Fernando? I remember, long ago, another starry night like this… In the firelight, Fernando, you were humming to yourself and softly strumming your guitar…” _ she stopped, then smiled. “I don’t remember any more of the song.”

“Sometimes I forget you play the guitar.”

“I’m a woman of many virtues, Donna Sheridan. Ask my husband.” Tanya said with confidence, making her friend let out a loud giggle. Donna walked to the entrance and turned off the lights, leaving the room only lit by the dim spotlights. Tanya watched intently, reaching for the glass of wine that had been forgotten on the table and taking a long gulp. She strummed the guitar softly. She started singing softly. “ _ I, I've been in love before, I thought I would no more manage to hit the ceiling... Still, strange as it seems to be, you brought it back to me… That old feeling.” _

_ “I, I don't know what you do, you make me think that you possibly could release me…”  _ the blonde continued the song as she approached, taking a seat next to the other and hugging her knees. She stared at Tanya, admiring her profile as her fingers played with the strings. _ “I think you'll be able to make all my dreams come true, and you ease me.” _

_ “You thrill me, you delight me. You please me, you excite me. You're something I'd been pleading for…” _

“ _ I love you, I adore you. I lay my life before you...” _

_ “I'll have you want me more and more…” _

_ “And finally it seems my lonely days are through…” _

_ “I've been waiting for you...” _

_ “I've been waiting for you...” _

Donna smiled, looking into the other’s eyes as they sang the chorus. A perfect duet, despite not being used to sing this song the two of them alone. It was as if it was written for them. She remembered that Tanya had written it not long after they created the Dynamos, but a few days before Rosie officially became one of them. She had always assumed that the song was about some boy Tanya had a crush on, but a different thought appeared as they sang. _What if…?_ Something clicked inside of her. “Tanya…” she pulled back and looked at the other, frowning in doubt. “Is this song… Is this song about me?”


	2. Andante, Andante

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the delay on the second chapter of this fic, life has been busy. From now on this fic will upload on Wednesdays.

Tanya’s eyes widened at her friend’s question, silence falling on the taverna as if no one were there. The heat of the spotlight burned on the brunette’s face, illuminating the wetness in her eyes. If there was something Donna liked about Tanya’s face, it was her blue eyes. There was always a shimmer in them, something that made them different from any other blue eyes Donna had ever seen. They were so joyful, so alive. But now, those eyes reflected sadness. The brunette looked away, looking defeated. “No, it’s not.”

“Tanya.”

“It’s not.” she repeated firmly, her voice cracking. Standing up and leaving Donna’s guitar on the side, the brunette took her purse and made her way to the door of the taverna, shutting it behind her as she ran outside. Donna stood up and ran behind her, realizing how it was starting to rain as they went up the stone steps of the main street. Tanya hadn’t been to the island for two years, and yet she knew perfectly how to get to the hotel— this island did not change despite how much time passed. Drops falling on her face, she did not stumble once, determined to get to the hotel and lock herself in the room Donna had prepared. She could hear the blonde calling her, panting behind her as they ran, but she didn’t stop. She had to run away, from the enigma that Donna had just solved. She crossed the entrance of  _ Villa Donna  _ without noticing the change around her, without realizing that the ruins of the hotel were starting to turn into walls. Entering the hall, she ran towards the staircase, not noticing the hole in one of the steps and falling face-first against the ground. “SHIT!”

“Tanya!” Donna yelled, running towards her. She kneeled next to the other as the young woman panted, groaning as she tried to take out her foot from the hole. “Wait, wait. It’s stuck.” the blonde spoke, looking around. She searched for something to open the hole, and thankfully she spotted a hammer on top of the counter. She went to grab it and focused on opening the hole, hitting the old wood softly. Finally, it broke down and Tanya pulled back. 

“Why is there a fucking hole on the stairs?!”

“Because it’s not finished!”

“How in the hell do you access the bedrooms then?!”

“The bedrooms are in the barn… temporarily.”

“I am going to sleep  _ in a barn?! _ ”

* * *

 

Tanya could not believe how Donna had fixed the abandoned barn to make a few bedrooms. Separated by stone walls, the barn had a common space and small bedrooms that were decorated with plants. A wooden bench and a closet were the only furniture besides the bed, rusty and old, and a rocking chair next to the window. “This actually looks good.” she said, looking through the small window as she took a seat. “Did you build it?”

“Only the walls that separate the rooms. The barn had windows so I just put the walls and hoped they wouldn’t fall down. Alesandro and Adrian taught me how to build them so that they would mix with the actual stone from the barn, and then I just bargained the furniture and everything.” Donna smiled as she opened the girl’s suitcase and started to hang her clothes on the closet. “That bed was from a woman who died last week.”

“It is such a cute detail to tell me that, Donna. I’m totally gonna be able to sleep tonight.”

“Hey, she didn’t die in that bed.”

“Thank god.”

“She actually died on the rocking chair.”

“Jesus.” Tanya stood up, chills running through her body. She groaned softly at the pain on her ankle, still red from being stuck. She leaned on the wall and kept staring through the window, watching the moonlight’s reflection on the calm water. The houses of the island remained dark, and she checked the time on her watch— it was almost three o’clock. A cruise ship sailed far away from the island, moving away slowly. Soon it would disappear in the horizon. She couldn’t help but think that, even though Villa Donna was still a hotel in ruins, it could have a future if someone actually invested in it. “Don’t tell your patrons that, tough. They’ll think this place is haunted.”

“It is not. Haven’t you seen how beautiful it is?”

“Yeah.” Tanya sighed and walked to the bed, sitting down and then taking her guitar. “Wanna sing before we go to sleep?”

“Always. Which one?”

“ _ Andante, Andante _ ?”

“Just like the day I started working at the taverna.”

“Exactly.”

“Okay, hit it.”

Tanya’s fingers moved expertly, her eyes closing as she played the first notes. This song was sometimes hard to play for her, memories coming every time she heard it, but she loved whenever Donna sang it. “ _ Take it easy with me, please... Touch me gently like a summer evening breeze. Take your time, make it slow. Andante, Andante, just let the feeling grow… _ ”

“ _ Make your fingers soft and light, let your body be the velvet of the night. Touch my soul, you know how... Andante, Andante, go slowly with me now. _ ”

“ _ I'm your music...” _

“ _ I am your music and I am your song... _ ”

“ _ I'm your song... _ ”

“ _ I am your music and I am your song... _ ” 

“ _ Play me time and time again and make me strong.” _

“ _ Play me again 'cause you're making me strong. _ ”

“ _ Make me sing, make me sound _ .”

“ _ Andante, Andante, tread lightly on my ground. _ ”

“ _ Andante, Andante, oh please don't let me down. _ ”

Tanya kept playing in silence, letting Donna finish the rest of the song by herself, her eyes looking intently at the blonde as she sang. There was always something in Donna’s voice that was captivating, a love for music that made everyone who listened become enchanted by it. Donna enjoyed singing, and she enjoyed the attention her voice got. She had written that feeling in a song years before, one of the few Donna had composed. She had gotten to sing it for the first time at their after-graduation party, with her best friends as her choir girls, and Tanya knew Donna treasured that memory deep in her heart. The guitar played softly, Donna’s eyes closed as she moved around the room. Tanya smiled.

“It is about you.” she said in a whisper.

“What?”

“The song.  _ I've Been Waiting For You _ . You were right before... It’s about you.” Tanya sighed and left the guitar next to her, biting her lip and looking down as she grabbed the sheets of the bed nervously. She did not want to confess everything, but she thought that Donna deserved to know, since she was the one to sing the song most of the time. “So when we met, the first day of college, I kinda had a immediate crush on you.”

“What?!”

“Please, let me talk. I don’t think I’m going to be able to say all this if you interrupt me.”

“Okay.”


	3. Chapter 3

“So the first day of college I was in the back of the room with Carla and Daphne, and this guy I dated, James. We were kinda drinking tequila before class, you know I did not study a lot back then. I tried to be a rebel, I guess. I remembered you entered with your hippie clothes and that flower crown on your head, and I thought, she’s got style at least. You sat down in the second row, and I could not see your face for hours. But then I kept hearing the guys in class talk about you, saying how you were gorgeous and that you had beautiful eyes and all that. And I started wondering how you looked, because I thought you were going to be competition. I mean, we’re taught to think that other women are competition, and I was the hottest girl in our year. And when I saw you, with your pretty face and your gorgeous eyes, I really thought you would destroy that, that you would replace me and become the one that attracted all stares. I hated you.

But then, two weeks later… Well, you were really nice to me when we actually met. I didn’t even know you were in the private dorm room next to mine until that day, because you always got to class at least ten minutes late. I was a bad student, but at least I wasn’t late. But, it was really nice of you to help me carry all those books into my dorm, and I thought, this girl looks like butter wouldn't melt in her mouth. I realized we were too different, both physically and personally, you were a dreamer with your dreams of traveling far away and of living a simple yet adventurous life, while I drank wine and read books while my parents paid for my accommodated life. When you got in my dorm and you offered to make tea for me, it felt good to say yes. I could observe you, see how you acted. And I realized you were the most innocent being I had ever met— until we met Rosie, of course. I mean, you freaked out when I put rum in the tea you had prepared.

You were looking at me gulping it down when I saw your guitar next to your bed, and you told me your dream was to travel around the world with it and your songs. I was so focused on hating you because of the threat you could be that I had not seen that you loved music like me, that you had also applied to be in the choir, and that had been rejected like me. You told me about your songs, about the chills it gave you to sing in front of people. And you know I love attention. And I just felt that I did not actually hate you, I… I really liked you. I realized I was not envious or hated your looks, I visually enjoyed you. That innocent yet powerful look, it was so different from the boys I dated. And honestly, I dated these guys because I loved the attention they gave me, not because I  _ loved  _ them. Hell, I hated to touch them, and kissing them was like kissing a drooly sloth.”

“A sloth?”

“You know what I mean. But I was not ready to accept that something was different in me, Donna. I had been denying it for years, because I had never felt it again since… Well. I guess I have to tell you now. I had a girlfriend when I was fifteen. My first love. The only time I fell in love actually. She was a beautiful redhead with green eyes, the daughter on another rich family, and we had a thing for a year. But then her parents found out, and sent her away to the states. And I never knew anything more of her. And I… I don’t know, I was devastated. I felt like something was really wrong with me, that if anyone knew they’d hate me. I don’t know. People say sexuality is fluid. Maybe one day I’ll meet a man I actually feel attracted to.”

“So you’re… a lesbian?”

“Yeah. I’ve known since I was fifteen.”

“But you flirt with a lot of men.”

“It’s called acting. Jamie Lee Curtis has nothing on me.”

“But what about your husband?”

“That’s… complicated. I kinda love him, but you know, as a friend I guess. It started two years ago. I’ve always faked that I feel attracted to men so that my parents are happy. This one got out of hand, my parents love him. When he asked me to marry him, what could I do? He’s a millionaire, Donna. He literally could help me show my songs to the public, maybe some singer wants them and makes them famous and I can actually start my career as a composer. So I said yes.”

“So your marriage is just… a contract.”

“He gives me an accommodated life and I pretend to love him.”

“And you’re happy with that?!”

“Well, I pretend I don’t know he is using me as a cover up to hide the fact that he likes men more than women, and he pretends to not to know I am a lesbian. It kinda works, and it is a good life for me. Honestly, the point is: he is rich, and I can divorce him after a few years if I ever feel like this doesn’t work. It’s not right, it’s not morally or ethically correct, but it’s okay to me. And it’s okay to him.”

“I don’t like this, Tanya. You’re better than that, and you deserve to be happy. Actually happy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here you have some backstory... to be continued!

**Author's Note:**

> To be continued?
> 
> This was my first time writing Tanya / Donna, and I loved it. I really hope you guys enjoyed it, leave some kudos and comments if you did. And if you didn't like something, tell me so I can improve it next time! - N.


End file.
